Dating a man with kids and an ex
They may want to stay engaged in a friendly or even a dating and/or a sexual relationship so they don’t have to move and can imagine that their ex is still there for them – or they may want their ex not to move on and by maintaining a friendship, romance, or sexual relationship, they can manipulate their ex into believing that there is still “something there” and “a chance” of getting back together.
I mean, think about it: What if your ex starts to get involved with someone else.
If that pay off is important, then that ex needs some therapy to build up their self esteem so they are okay without that payoff.
Ending a relationship can be difficult -- even when the relationship is painful.
Some exes may want to stay engaged in fighting because at least it’s some form of contact with an ex – as opposed to none.
How intimate can that relationship be if you keep up your relationship with them? Now, don’t get me wrong – it’s terrific to stay friends with your ex if the friendship is a natural one that you don’t force, and you do honor your divorce and any new relationships that you or your ex get involved in – that means putting the new boyfriend or girlfriend first, ahead of the ex-spouse.
How’s the new girlfriend or boyfriend going to feel? The way you can judge if your natural friendship with your ex is healthy is if you can stay friends and maintain your own identity without your relationship with your ex interfering in your life or your relationships. When you bump into your ex, say hello or, if you are able, shake hands or hug or kiss on the cheek cordially – the same way you would greet a business associate.
That's what's in store for you when you date a guy with kids.
He's not just looking for a girlfriend, he's looking for a there's more to motherhood when mothering HIS kids: You must win them over; your own kids love you from the start. When I dated a man with kids, I heard, "My mom doesn't do my braid like that" and, "Don't tell me what to do!I figured that a dad came with real life experience. Well, she’s a kid and doesn’t understand her mom’s need for male companionship.” In response to her daughter’s fears, this mom has asked her boyfriend to slow down. “I want to give the daughter time to accept and trust a new man in their lives. I’m a single guy, and I get a bit lonely.” In the meantime, the mom has made it very clear that she cares about him, but she’s afraid.In fact, it is often more helpful to cut off completely in order to move on.Lots of times an ex will maintain contact because they don’t’ want to move on. If you didn’t have kids, how could you possibly understand the ins and outs of raising children? And, as you know, I am now married to a man who did not have any kids. ) So, when I recently heard from a man who’s dating a single mom, I paused because the story sounded similar to mine. She wants him to be a part of their lives, “but she uses the phrase ‘baby steps’ a lot, which says to me… And I don’t want to leave, so I guess I’m resigned to giving the relationship more time.” If you’re a single mom, have you ever dated a man without kids? If you’re a single guy (I know that some of you DO read this blog!Tags: Adult Dating, affair dating, sex dating