entourage validating and copying link data - Kids of divorce and dating
I'm hurt because I give him everything and I want him to be a part of my entire life, not just pieces. I am dating a very recently divorced man with 3 kids who is 12 years older than me. He is so good to me, I couldn't ask for a better boyfriend when we're together. I know he wants a smooth transition for the kids, but I am left feeling lonely, sad and left out.
I feel that if he loves me like he says he does then he should feel and do the same. I think that being with a divorced guy with kids really depends on the situation. I include him in all aspects of my life: I got him on my softball team, he's met/hung out with my friends multiple times, he's met my family, I invite him everywhere. I am dating a man with 2 sons from his ex-wife and a daughter with his ex-gf.
I've never felt like this, so it's hard for me to turn my back on it just because they aren't happy with it. Coming from experience, it is really up to you if it is worth it. I feel ill about it all now and am deciding if I can, and will it always be like this. I want to be married and possibly have kids of my own. I don't want to be in the same place I am now a year from now and I'm really worried I will be. Guy, I appreciated reading the other post you send.
I am the only woman the kids have met, so he is very protective of them. He also travels alot for work,so in his limited free time he is torn between his kids OR me instead of me AND the kids?
I want him to be a good father, put his children first, go to all the fball games and track meets, but does that mean putting my feelings,needs,wants, on a shelf...settling?!
Money was always tight because of his child support. What do you want in life I never thought about it then, but I think about it everyday now. LOL...seems like decades ago when I wrote about my story here. Someone once told me if a man really loves you hell move heaven and earth for you. If hes putting you on the back burner for other things then its not love its convience for them.
The excuse well I got kids so youll always be second is lame.
It your happy right now, you should keep going with it. I feel like I am not included in the most important aspect of his and it hurts. I am an Asian, we don't believe in divorce and that sort of thing. I am in this dilemma as I am also not sure if we will have a good future together...he's hesitant to get married and not so sure of having another child.
Just remember that it is still the beginning and you might not end up with him anyway. Troe1113, I realize that the situations are not exactly the same, but you could be in for a long wait and not even know if he's going to involve you or not with his kids. We talk about it often but nothing has changed and he keeps telling me to be patient. I am 33 yrs old, never been married and want children of my own.
In my opinion only, it MAY be that he is just not comfortable enough with your relationship yet to involve his kids heavily. Try to be very understanding and have a long talk with him to express your concerns. I have spent time (dinner...3 times) with the 15 yr old daughter and met the 10 yr old son.
Also, depending upon the situation with his ex, he may have concerns that she may not agree with his choices and try to make it more difficult for him to see his kids. He and their mother have been divorced for 3 1/2 years.
We live together, and we have the kiddos half of the time. Maybe he's worried about how you'll feel about the kids, or vice-versa. I was getting over an abusive relationship and my mom passing away. He was always busy with his kids, he ignored our son to be with his other kids. His family never accepted me, because they were so close to his ex wife. i know every situation differs..the fact remains the same..has priorities other than you. I think sometimes women settle because we dont think for some reason we arent going to get anything better, past hurts low self esteem etc.Tags: Adult Dating, affair dating, sex dating